You have no idea how happy this makes me.

The shins playing the streets of Paris. I almost cried, seriously.

http://www.dailymotion.com/related/3520037/video/x1pcay_44-the-shins-part1/1

There is also a really really great one of sufjan. Really really great. Really really really great.

9th grade nostalgia night

is tomorrow just a day
like all the rest
how could you know just what you did
so full of faith yet full of doubt
I ask
again
I shall ask you this once again
he said
I am but one small instrument
do you remember that?
time and time again you said
don't be afaid
if you believe you can do it
the only voice i want to hear is yours
again
I shall ask you this once again
he said
I am but one small instrument
do you remember that?
so here here I am above palm trees
so straight and tall
you are smaller
getting smaller but I still
see
you

-jimmy eat world


(I think I am going to have to put A Prayer for Owen Meany as number one on my summer reading list, cause it's kind of stalking me a little bit)

please be patient with me

Ok, I really like this new Wilco album. It's so 70s and nostalgic sounding. Not that I was alive in the 70s, but my parents were, and my earliest music memories reflect this.

Tonight I am staying up all night, just because it's easier that way. What's the point of sleeping for a couple hours, just to be incredibly late and not rested and worse at life in general? Besides, early morning hours are good for wallowing.

Today I went to a student reading of poetry and prose and there was some really amazing stuff going on there. My tutor for fiction class was one of the people reading and her stories were really great, which makes me feel good about the fact that she always compliments my writing (which is even better when I consider that I don't actually try very hard at all in that class because it annoys me). The other three people were great too; I won't go into it, but you can just take my word, I suppose. I wondered to myself how it is that these guys who are only a couple years older than I am manage to take themselves so seriously, not just as writers, but in general. I have a lot of trouble taking myself seriously. I feel the need to apologize for the things I do, or laugh them off as silly even when I don't think they are silly at all. At this point in my life, however, this may be for the best.

Tonight I had a strong urge to get in my car and go running (that is, driving--this is america, after all) for the hills. More specifically, the foothills directly below mount baldy. I'm not sure what caused this, besides the pure and pathetic need to escape. The season finale of Lost depressed me a lot, among other things, and I just wanted to get out. Maybe it's just spring fever. Maybe the sun just needs to come out (did you know in san diego they have something called "may gray"? "June gloom" doesnt quite seem to cover it down here by the ocean. they had to come up with "may gray" as well to articulate the extent of this dismal mediocre weather that is the bane of every student's springtime existence). Maybe I just need to do my german grammar exercises and not write so much poetry, or papers about it for that matter. Yeah, must be all the poetry.

The Shins

Look, I know a lot of people don't think they're that big a deal, but I never understood it. I guess they're not exactly groundbreaking or anything, but they have produced three nearly perfect albums of damn good music. Everything is just so good, the lyrics and the bass and the catchy melodies and it's all so controlled but fun and sad and nostalgic and you can sing along really loud. Yet while the goodness remains constant, their sound completely changes with each album, which is amazing! I mean you can barely even recognize the vocals as being from the same guy. OK, I guess you can, but you get my point. I guess people never really forgave them for the Garden State thing, and I agree that listening to someone as important as Natalie Portman talk about the shins like she's one of us pathetic souls-- who need independent music, the idea of independent music, like we need coffee, mothers, human touch-- is like nails on a chalk board. But if any band deserved such a blatant name drop, it was the shins. They're so ridiculously accessible, that I'm surprised it didn't happen sooner. Besides, if Zack Braff had known he was going to take the indie right out of his favorite indie band, i.e. if he had known his film was going to be such a hit, I like to think he might not have done it. Anyway, the point of this absurd post is simply to say that I am finally going to go see them tomorrow, after at least six years of fandom, and I am stoked.

In other news, non-fat cream cheese is grossgrossgrossgrossgross. It has this really terrible chalky texture that literally made me gag a few minutes ago. Thanks Summit for helping me start the day off right.

like a rolling stone
a like a rolling stone
like the FBI
and the CIA
and the BBC
BB King
a Doris Day
Matt Busby
dig it dig it dig it dig it dig it dig it dig it dig it

Paradiddle

I just saw Ratatat at the pub--FOR FREE! (Imagine i said that like the "unforgivable" guy please, ok thanks) It was like omg so fun, charles and eric and I and others were dancing like crazy and whitfield was dancing a little bit too. Their music is great, and although I would probably never sit around and listen to it, it's perfect for a show. Also, they had a really nice thing going on with the screen and the shadows... never mind. Definitely going on my list of favorite concerts. It's nice to go to shows here and run into all kinds of people and meet people and see people in general. Especially on a tuesday.

In other news, HAPPY BIRTHDAY to my lovely roommate Pam Rajagopal. It's the big 2-0. In other words, my roommate is very depressed today. But we will cheer her up with some delicious Greek goodness, most likely involving many different cheeses. Can't wait!

The thing about the Mountain Goats' "Get Lonely" is that I feel like I could have done it myself. "But you didn't," you say. No, wait, no, that was me. I said that. And it's quite a valid point, I think. But thinking you could have done it yourself is still one step down from awe and amazement. I don't really know where I'm going with this. Ok, wait, I figured it out. It's that the argument "But you didn't" doesn't really go far, because, well, I still could have. It's still the ones you're in awe of that are really the best, I think. At this moment, I think that. Ask me again later.


edit: or does the fact that you didn't imply that you couldn't have? I suppose it probably does, but then, just the fact that you are even thinking that you could have says a lot about the thing you supposedly could have done.

Now I remember. What I really wanted to write about was the music I listened to on the way back to school on sunday. It was many things, but towards the end it was jimmy eat world and the get up kids. It was basically a 14 year old mandy party, and it was wonderful. You know that song "the middle"? I used to LOVE that song. Now I think it's so corny and lame but back then I would actually be comforted by it. even now that i do think it's corny and lame, I still can't help but be comforted by it. And man, the get up kids, so good. I remember listening to them on my cd player going to band competitions. It would be so nice, getting on the bus in the evening and being in love with the older boys and listening to some good old fashioned emo. Those were the days. Just kidding, those days sucked and I wouldn't go back to them if you gave me a million bucks. But the get up kids and jimmy eat world made it better, and they still make it better now that they suck.

I am excited because Yasha and I are both going to be in the same intro to fiction class next quarter. I miss having people in the same class as me, it's so fun to talk about the teacher and annoying people together. Got an interview set up for tomorrow with my German teacher, and I'm keeping my fingers crossed that her parents were Nazis or something interesting like that. Wow, what a terrible thing to say. It's true though, so I won't erase it. You as my blog reader should know who you're dealing with here. Anyway, things are looking up, except for the fact that I might be coming down with a cold. Up, down. Good times.

Oh yeah, um, William Blake is so great! I hope I can take a class on him next year while in England. That would be incredible. I am starting to get really anxious about the whole thing. I was in the programs abraod office yesterday and it got me to thinking about the fact that I should be finding out where I got in really soon. Scary! And uuuuugh omg I looked at my file and read the letter of recommendation that my old Muir 50 teacher did for me. It's really well written and it would be the better of the two except for the fact that it had like FIVE TYPOS! No kidding! Like what a jerk, come on. When you agree to write a letter for someone it's kind of understood that you're going to proofread it at least once! Now I probably won't get into Kings, and it won't even be my fault! I mean I guess I should have read it and not let him drop it off directly to the office, but even if I had, what was I supposed to do? "Hi, the letter you wrote for me has several glaring grammatical errors. I have marked them with a red pen. Please turn in your revised copy along with the original by tomorrow in order to recieve full credit." What an awkward position to put someone in. I am tired of being out in awkward positions!

I am listening to the Arcade Fire for the first time right now (late, as always) and it's pretty good!

It really doesn't get much better than this.

"When you take a sip you buzz like a hornet
Billy Shakespeare wrote a whole lotta sonnets"

"There was a good man named Paul Revere
I feel much better baby when you're near."

"Summertime girls are the kind I like
I'll steal your honey like I stole your bike"



...more on that later.

so like

I used to drink caramel frapuccinos. gross. But am I the only one that tastes paper when I drink coffee out of a paper cup? I think it is my imagination, plus the fact that coffee kind of tastes like paper anyway.

Last.fm can't tell you this because I took it off my blog for the week, until it stops spreading lies about me. But omg, Devendra Banhart. omg.

This is what i think about every morning on my way to german

I would like to make a garden state-esque type movie with me as the main character, only played by someone cuter. You know, a coming of age type thing with a really good soundtrack. I would make the whole entire movie just so that the very last scene could be me, breaking into dance on Muir field, while "I'll Believe in Anything" plays. My problem would be resolved, and I would walk off with a slight smile on my face just as the song began. As the drums come in and my smile would get bigger, I would maybe even laugh a little, and the camera would be facing me as I walked with this stupid grin on my face for a little bit. By the time the vocals came in I would running accross the grass, doing a silly flailing-arms-in-the-air-and-hopping-and-turning-in-a-circle type dance. The song continues to play as the camera pans out, eventually showing all the people walking by on their way to class like nothing's wrong, and then the whole muir/revelle area, finally cutting to credits around the end of the first verse. people would turn to each other and say "That was good," and they would stay for the credits so they could enjoy the rest of the song, and also because the movie was so good that they need a few minutes to absorb it. As the other amazing, yet slightly more toned down, indie song (maybe the first half of winter's love? no, no, but something like it.) began to play, they would stand up, stretch, and head toward the exit, and would spend the rest of the night drinking coffee at Denny's.

coachella 2007 lineup


hmmmmm

Half Handed Cloud- Skip the Rope : )

My banjo skills are seriously lacking.

The good thing about doing laundry on a saturday night is you can do all four (yes, four!) loads at once. The bad thing about doing laundry on a Saturday night is that you're doing laundry on a Saturday night.

I think I am going to do my writing assignment about the show I am going to at the che cafe on tuesday. The Finches and Rafter will be there, as well a couple other bands I have not heard of. Terrible music and hip kids will abound, and it should make for some good material.

double standards

Within the past couple of years I think I have become somewhat of a feminist. Or maybe not so much, but at any rate I have lately been noticing a lot of things that suck about the way we think about women and men. Here are two things that have recently annoyed me.

1. The notion that in order for a woman to be a singer she must have a good voice. There are plenty of men who sing who have very average or very bad voices. Yet a woman feels that her voise must be "pretty" in order for her to use it. I discussed this with Sarah and she suggested that part of this might come from the fact that when girls are in band, they often sing and do nothing else. So in that case it would make slightly more sense that we expect her to have a good voice, but is still not totally fair in my opinion. If a person wants to play music and sing, they should do it, and if it's socially acceptable for a man to get up there and belt out complete crap, it should be for a woman as well.

2. The notion that any book with a woman as the main character is necessarily a girl book. Or even that any book written by a woman must be a girl book. So not fair! Women read books about men ALL THE TIME. Yet a man can't pick up Jane Eyre without being gay. Just because a character is a woman, just because the story may have something to do with love or marriage, doesn't make it sappy or stupid or girly. Obviously what brought this to mind was all the thinking I've been doing about Jane Austen lately. Her novels are notoriously known as chick books, love stories, etc. But anyone who's actually read one of them knows that this is entirely not the case. Her novels are actually about the economics of marriage, marriage without love, marriage because it's your only choice. They are about choosing the lesser of two evils. They are about the marginalized position that women of a certain time period and social class found themselves in, and the limited choices they had to make within those confines. There are no romantic love scenes, Darcy proposes to Elizabeth casually during a walk through the park, and Wentworth finally tells Anne of his true feelings throuhg a slightly anticlimactic letter. I could go on. But more importantly, they are well written, full of irony and double meanings and the subtle sarcasm that makes them so enjoyable. I think that Oscar Wilde said something like there is no such thing as a good book or a bad book, a book is either well written or badly written. And I think the same goes for this; there is no such thing as a girls book or a boys book. If it's a good book, everyone should be able to read it without some social stigma attached to it.

...

girl power!

Half of what I say is meaningless

the scene is thus: german discussion, 9:30 AM, york hall. teacher is describing the beat movement in 1960s germany. Is currently discussing music.

"...such as the Beatles. Is anyone a Beatles fan?"

I weigh my options. I could go non-conformist and not raise my hand. I could justify it to myself-- overrated, haven't listened to them for months, have a newfound approval for the current music scene, see no need to harp on the past. I decide against it. It would be unforgivably elitist not to raise my hand. I raise it.

Half a second later I realize that nobody in my line of vision has raised their hand with me. I look right, I look left, I look right again, twisting my head around for good measure. Nobody in the entire room has raised their hand besides me!

At first I was just mildly embarassed. The class went on and I didn't think about it too much. But now, sitting here considering it, I am completely dumbfounded. Who ARE these people?!!! EVERYONE likes the Beatles. They are VERY FEW people out there who do not like the Beatles! What the odds of 30 non-beatles-liking young college students ending up in the same classroom all at once? It's not that I care about their music taste, though I think it goes without saying that these kids are the rankest of philistines. I am more just baffled by the probability of such a phenomenon having occured. nobody? NOBODY?! So much for not looking like an elitist, eh? my goodness.

First day of class. So far, German, same as last quarter only earlier and farther away. Had terrible nightmares last night so found it easy to wake up at 8. Study abroad application progressing nicely. Current favourite song: "I'll Believe in Anything" by Wolf Parade. over and out.

Here are some things which I have recently enjoyed:

Tha Namesake by Jhumpa Lahiri (half of it anyway)

the Santa Anas

The Ice Storm by Rick Moody

Flannery O'Conner

Wolf Parade

sleepsleepsleepsleep

leftover Christmas candy



I am totally incapable of being productive these last few days of break. Hopefully when I return to school I will have the proper motivation to finish my application for England. I mean I will do it anyway, but hopefully I am motivated to. I can't believe I am actually doing this. I literally cannot believe it. And I can't decide whether I am looking forward to the moment of realization or not.

If you run, he will chase you

I haven't been writing in this thing because I have been playing my banjo instead. Basically I only have time in the day for sleeping, hanging out with people, and one other thing. Usually that one other thing is the computer. But this week it is banjo. I don't actually know of many musicians that play the banjo so I have been working on some easy sufjan songs. Like "It's Christmas! Lets be Glad!" which only has 2 chords until you get to the chorus, which is where I stop, and also "Seven Swans" which is nice and slow and features chords which are close together and not that hard. I think I have improved a litle bit. At any rate, I have memorized a lot of chords, which is a good start I guess, even if they sound like crap when I actually play them. Does anyone have advice about howto go about learning a string instrument? Do you just learn a bunch of songs and figure out chords and technique as you go along? Or do you learn chords and technique and then pick songs you know you can play? Do you learn theory first, or last? Do you learn to read sheet music or tabs? I have never taught myself an instument before so this is all new to me.

I think that playing music is probably one of the most frustrating things to do, but also one of the most rewarding when you finally get something right. I remember playing fast runs over and over and over again in marching band until my forearms burned and my hands cramped up and I had blisters between my fingers, sometimes because I was forced to but sometimes out of my own free will. Even then I would just keep getting it wrong over and over again until I felt like crying. The thing is that improvement in music is so painstakingly gradual that you rarely notice it has taken place at all unless you actually take a second to think about how badly you sucked before. But I just wish I could be really good at like 5 instuments RIGHT NOW. Sigh, why didn't I start sooner?

excited!!!!!!!!!

Just look at that face.



I haven't been this thrilled by a christmas gift since rollerblades.